Oh, how I used to envy the famous girl groupies when I was a teenager! I read about their daring, salacious exploits in the fangirl magazines of the day, and I was enthralled. It was all a fantasy, though....I could have never been so bold and confident, and I wasn't fashion model material....but any female rock fan worth her platform shoes would have loved to trade places with them for at least one steamy night.
Now that I've read Pamela Des Barres' reprinted memoir, I'm With the Band: Confessions of a Groupie, and her friend and fellow groupie Catherine James' autobiography, Dandelion: Memoir of a Free Spirit, I have to admit that my star-fucker envy has evaporated. If you think being dumped by your pimply wannabe-rockstar boyfriend was painful, try being dumped by Mick Jagger or Jimmy Page. Not a very happy scenario.
While Des Barres seemingly had a happy childhood and stable loving family as an only child growing up in the San Fernando Valley of southern California, James had a horrific childhood at the hands of her neglectful, abusive, drug-addicted mother who made Joan "Mommy Dearest" Crawford look like Mary Poppins by comparison. While reading about Des Barres roaming the streets and staying out all night while a teen living at home, I kept thinking, "Where were her parents? I would have never gotten away with that." Meanwhile, James' mother never seemed to miss her or care that she would disappear from home....in fact, she finally ran away for good at the age of fourteen, from Los Angeles to Greenwich Village in New York City after meeting and getting to know a young Bob Dylan.
Both young women have remarkable histories in that they both met, hooked up with, and were influenced by men who we now know as legendary rock stars, but at the time most of them were just starting out on the road to fame. Both memoirs capture the wild, fast-paced flavor of popular culture in the '60s and '70s. Des Barres became a protege of Frank Zappa, and was one of the infamous G.T.O.'s, while James hung out at Andy Warhol's Factory in Manhattan. James had a son by Denny Laine of the Moody Blues, and then lived with Jackson Browne in L.A. before he was famous. Both women had affairs with Mick Jagger and Jimmy Page, along with many other rockilicious conquests. They both had the good fortune to be in the right place at the right time....and their stunning good looks certainly helped open doors.
Des Barres writes in a whimsical, almost Valley-Girl "Omigod" style, especially when quoting from her old diaries, but it illustrates her mindset at that age and era. Sometimes her prose gets a bit flowery. James writes in a more straight-forward, matter-of-fact tone, which is effective and shocking when she reminisces about her Dickensian childhood. I'm a sucker for old photos, and the autobiographical photos in both books did not disappoint. They are both obviously intelligent women and survivors, which can't be said for many of their peers. I definitely give major props for that.
I highly recommend both books for insight into the world of rock from a female point of view. Rock has always been highly male-dominated, and I don't think much has changed as far as women's roles in rock. There seems to be two main positions: on your back or on your knees. While Des Barres and James may be seen as early feminists who enjoyed free love and casual sex on their own terms, they were often used and hurt by men. Many of the passages are heavily poignant. I found both books engrossing to the point where I read long into the night.
I have one of Des Barres' other books (Let's Spend the Night Together: Backstage Secrets of Rock Muses and Supergroupies) on order at my local library. Hopefully the person who checked it out will return it someday.....if they haven't taken it with them on a rock & roll tour in pursuit of a longed-for conquest.....
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